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I'm amazed at the notion when I look around at this town that at some point so-called "city planners" were remotely necessary. In the subdivision I live in, they tried to space the driveways where yours wouldn't be directly across from your neighbors, so what did they put there instead? The mailboxes. But, when you make what's supposed to be a two lane road thru a subdivision, only wide enough for one lane, you end up with mailboxes consistenly backed into and bashed all to hell. It doesn't surprise me though because when you live in a small town long enough, you know thru girlfriends or boyfriends or friends or relatives the people that might have had some sorry part in it's shaping. And one of those such friends I had in high school, his father was, yehp, a "city planner". Let me just say, he was short, fat, bald and seemed so dim-witted and slow that I couldn't even impose intelligent thought on his person. He was like looking at a blank slate. When you're foraging thru the raw materials in a small town, you've gotta lower the bar a bit on the local chapter of Mensa. When you've got positions to fill, and you need warm bodies, sometimes whether or not they're capable of forming a complete sentence is always required. A few years ago when I was living in Philadelphia, my girlfriend lived almost across the street from Kevin Bacon's parents, (yeah, o.k., toss me in with that retarded game, go ahead), and his father was a city planner. A far more prestigious position I would imagine since there, you actually had to do some organization and developing to work with the space there. You can't just stick a gas station on the side of the road, leave an empty acre then stick a Wal-mart and then stick another gas station, (which will eventually close and become something entirely unrelated to it's previous function as a thrift store or a limosine service. I'm not making those examples up you know), on the adjoining acre. You have to work out the dynamics and logistics and plan, plan, plan. Anyway, it really caught me by surprise to see Edmund Bacon on the local news there one time. It was in regards to some redevelopment of an area around the art museum, an area that originally was built based on his designs. He took the podium, white hair, thin, in his late eighties, and all I heard after that was a string of beeps as they censored out the profanity. For a dapper distinguished fellow, he still had a certain blue collar way. Apparently you just don't fuck with his designs and his love for the city. I have to envy such passion at times. What was my point? I'm ashamed to say I just wanted to bitch and poke another jab at this town. I can't help it, I'm petty. Well, I suppose I should say "Happy Thanksgiving", but uh, I'd really rather take a rain check on the whole holiday thing. So, here's hoping it goes as painless as possible..
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